Different people perceive things differently. This is my take on things, I, an average human being...speak now...

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Live-in Relationships....Everyone has somethin' to say...

With the more so-called "polished" and "educated" western culture dominating our lives, everyone, young and old, in some way or the other, tries to justify live-in relationships. Now let me get this straight. I am a guy, and I'll be able to earn my living in the near future, and so if a girl wants to have a live-in with me, I'll definitely say YES. Damn society and damn all moral values....why should I say no at all?

This is how a man thinks. Now who can ever figure out a woman's mind? Even great thinkers have failed trying to fathom a woman's mind. The sophisticated, western, self-dependent woman of today can jump into the so-called helpless Indian outfit anytime. She could demand stability in her life and dream about chiming wedding bells. What if the man doesn't want to convert it into a long-term relationship? Who becomes the loser now? What will happen of the woman if she's conceiving? Who'll take the child's responsibility?

The fact that often goes unnoticed is that, the so-called broad-minded thinkers who demand legalization of live-in relationships, shun from such questions. Is there any need to create an edict that has potential disaster written all over it for the fair sex, when the national capital itself is brimming with injustice against women?

It's not that marriages never fail. But the contract implied by marriage has witnesses in the form of relatives and friends, who, knowingly or unknowingly, help in binding the spouses together. The court can intervene in marital conflicts; who the hell intervenes in live-in conflicts?
Just blindly looking at Europeans kissing and saying goodbye, and wishing our lives were like theirs, is no way to happiness.
As Indians, we know how insecure people can get with ups and downs in such "nomadic" personal lives.


  1. I think, live in will be a good way to judge ur partner before actually marrying...the worst thing is marrying som1 and then it turns out u cant get along.....then divorce nd worse - alimony

  2. I couldn't agree more. Live in relationships in India are part of the trend to ape everything western. Where is our discerning capability folks? While the west is moving more towards creating stable marriages, are we really trying to prove that we can also get equally bad; from a very good system, that is.

    While talking of kids coming out of such relationships may be a little far fetched, what exactly do we gain by such a liaison with a member of the opposite sex. Nothing. It is just a desperate attempt to appear civilized (?!), to say we won't fall into the older generation's mould. And in the end if each of these partners get married to a another person, what is the guarantee that those persons will appreciate this sense of modernness exhibited by their spouses before marriage. If you are in a live in relationship, you should remain so or get married to the same person. Indian society and people are not yet "modern" enough (I wish it never becomes so) to such "civilized" acts.

  3. @ hrishi: It's supposedly a very good aplication of the live-in theory, but unfortunately humans an't mechanical creatures being able to erase past memories of live-in relations that did not materialize, which may in turn pose threats to the current relationship.

    @ Venky: A solid stand and a very good view of the issue of "trying to appear civilized".

  4. Live-in relationships as such are not good for Indian society and should be discouraged at a social level.

    However, we have to accept the fact that more and more urban youth are going to adopt live-in relationships and the unregulated nature of such relationships in India causes problems.
    Hence, there should be some laws in place which gives some basic rights to women involved in long-term live in, etc